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We Need to Talk About Chronic Illness and Suicidal Thoughts

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It’s really shit when you have days, weeks, months when you don’t want to exist. It’s even more shit when you feel unable to talk about that feeling, for fear of the panic and upset that it might cause for those close to you or professionals you speak to.

Society has taught us that feeling suicidal is irrational, frantic, urgent, scary. Sometimes it is all of those things, but often it’s fleeting thoughts, feelings of wanting to “disappear,” or having no feelings at all.

It can be slow and passive and not look like wanting to hurt yourself or making a plan to. When I first had thoughts about finding it too hard to live with my chronic illnesses, I think I scared myself.

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