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Moral Scrupulosity OCD Made Me Think I Would Murder My Mother

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themighty.com

I sat in my GP’s windowless office, wracked with sobs, gripping the denim of my pants and bracing myself against the truth. “Either you call an ambulance to lock me away in a ward or you call the cops and take me to prison before I murder my mother.”  I have obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), but not the “classic” hand-washing kind; something referred to as moral scrupulosity OCD.

It’s a subset of intrusive thoughts fixated on moral judgment. I agonize over whether a decision of mine is morally right or which option is fairest, which on the surface sounds like quite a good thing to do.

To be sure that each action I take is morally justifiable. However, this obsession with being scrupulous quickly turns sour.

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