For as long as I can recall I have hated Playboy. I didn’t know why, but something about the magazine, the brand, Hugh Hefner and just the whole enterprise would make me feel angry and physically ill.
In retrospect, what it triggered within me were emotional and somatic flashbacks of trauma I had yet to uncover. But I didn’t have context for that yet.
All I knew was that deep within every corner of my body and heart there was so much discomfort swirling that it felt like my insides were being torn apart.
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