liking life feelings

Better Help: Affordable Online Therapy, Anywhere in the World

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tinybuddha.com

**This is a sponsored post to introduce you to , a company I highly recommend! I hear it all the time—”I’m feeling more depressed than ever, and nothing seems to help.” I see it in blog comments.

I read it in forum posts and social media replies. I also get stories like this in my inbox from people who are struggling to find a sense of peace and control in the constant chaos of their lives.

And I empathize with all of them. I know what it’s like to feel overwhelmed and stuck, physically and emotionally, and helpless to change what isn’t working.

Read more on tinybuddha.com
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I breathe deep and shake out my shoulders, letting my breath loosen the knots in my stomach. I’ve met enough therapists in my mental health journey that the initial sessions don’t phase me much anymore. Today is different, though, at least in part because I’ve never met a therapist online. My nerves start to settle as we work through the get-to-know-you questions, and — he blindsides me. He reaches off-screen and grabs a knife, holding it casually in front of the screen like it’s no big deal. It’s a letter opener, he tells me. Somewhere in the logical minority of my mind, I know that letter openers aren’t all that sharp. Still, the one glinting at me through the screen is shaped like a sword, and I feel my composure start to crack. After a brief discussion of how the on-screen blade is making me feel, my new therapist — remember, I have never met this man before in my life — swivels the point of the blade toward his throat and rests it against his skin, right over where his jugular vein must be. My palms are drenched. My heart is racing. My stomach could outweigh the sun. Despite my growing desire to slam my laptop shut and never see this person ever again, I sit still and finish the session, trying my best to stay present as my new therapist removes the letter opener from the screen and talks me through the experience.
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